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Thursday, 6 October 2011

tanta coisa

6 oct 2011


fotos de meu celular, a caminho da clinica, highfield campus.
faz tanto tempo que planejo contar aqui as coisas maravilhosas que tem me acontecido, mas nao tenho conseguido fazer muito . . . e o pensamento ta aqui, sempre.

depois vou contar, postando nos dias em que aconteceram, a viagem maravilhosa que fiz com minha irma, que veio me visitar, aa alemanha. os dias com ela foram magicos.

ela foi embora semana passada, dia 28 de setembro, e eu mais ou menos voltei aa vida normal por aqui.

muita coisa boa, alegrias e momentos inesqueciveis, mas tambem, nao sei porque, to vivendo um momento pessoal muito dificil. eh dele que vou falar hoje. meu coracao ta pedindo muito para eu falar sobre isso aqui. aas vezes me freio e nao falo de coisas ruins, principalmente a meu respeito, para nao despertar impressoes erradas de que quero pena ou atencao, mas esse assunto acho que merece ser mencionado, inclusive porque ele eh parte importante de mim, de quem eu sou. e eu estou neste blog da forma mais verdadeira que consigo ser, assim nessa linguagem de imagens e palavras tao abertas a um clique.

seguinte: ja faz tempo que venho tendo episodios de falta de folego e um peito apertado, temperado com medo de ficar sozinha ou de outras coisas, tipo ambiente fechado demais e multidao [de multidao eu nunca gostei, nao vejo sentido nem divertimento em estar esprimida numa multidao]. eu vinha contornando como podia, fazendo meditacao, chorando, conversando com amigos, escutando musica otima, caminhando no parque, e tomando um lexotan quando sentia que so ele ia me acalmar.

entao, acho que tudo se agravou desde a semana passada, ou desde as duas ultimas semanas. eu ate desconfio das razoes, mas isso nao eh o mais importante aqui. tive um episodio dificil em londres, no metro, precisamente na linha picadilly, que eh na verdade mais profunda que as outras. laaaa no fundo tem um vento forte, que eh a circulacao natural do ar. para sair dali ou para entrar voce tem duas opcoes: ou esprimida num elevador ou por escadas que tem aas vezes 193 ou 175 degraus (como eh informado la). uma vez fomos de elevador (eu e kassandra) e na outra vez eu insisti pela escada. bom, na saida da estacao covent garden eu fiquei esbaforecida na subida da escada e decidi que por aquele final de semana eu me pouparia de tal estresse. kassandra concordou e a partir de entao caminhamos mais, e foi otimo, e tambem andamos nos otimos onibus londrinos o final de semana inteiro. importante eh que nao sai correndo de la, dos meus planos do programa feliz em londres, apenas arranjamos uma alternativa para a situacao dificil que se manifestou ali. eu ja estive outras vezes em londres e ja andei muito nos metros, porem apenas uma vez em elevador-sardinha. normalmente eh tranquilo.

ai, nessa segunda-feira agora, dia 3 de outubro, eu fui ao student service centre [ssc] da universidade, pagar minha matricula aqui. fui de onibus, mas decidi descer antes, no avenue campus, e fiz o restante do trajeto a pe. na chegada em highfield, caminhando para o predio do ssc eu fui vendo aquele monte de alunos novos e todo mundo me pareceu tao estranho. claro, sao alunos novos. helloooo!!! chegando ao ssc vi uma fila tao gigante que ia ate a porta do predio. entrei na fila, que caminhava lentamente, apesar de ter ali quatro ou cinco pessoas atendendo a gente.

quando fui chegando pertinho de ser atendida meu folego foi apertando. cheguei ate a mulher que ia me atender ja passando mal. disse que queria pagar minha matricula e tirei da bolsa minha carteira de estudante e meu cartao de credito. olhei para ela e disse 'nao to me sentindo bem'. na mesma hora ela disse que ia me dar agua. parou tudo e foi comigo ali para o lado. ela foi um anjo. ai me ofereceu agua, disse que devia ser porque o dia tava meio quente, mais ou menos 17 graus, e perguntou se eu queria mais alguem para me ajudar, uma profissional. eu disse que sim e la vem a ollie, uma senhora que trabalha la mesmo, aparentemente treinada para esses socorros.

ollie foi um anjo. ela disse que ficaria comigo o tempo que fosse necessario e me levou para um ponto com porta aberta, para eu pegar um ar puro. conversamos sobre varias coisas e ela perguntou se eu tinha alguem para telefonar. eu disse que tenho a hilra, que eh pesquisadora ali no depto xxxx, e trabalha com a professora doutora xxxx. ollie localizou a hilra rapidinho e la vem a hilra e a xxxx, para me ver. professora doutora xxxx foi um anjo. professora precisou voltar ao trabalho e deixou a hilra comigo.

hilra foi um anjo. so a presenca dela me trouxe a sintonia ao mundo real, que nao eh assim tao escuro. e ela ficou comigo e me disse coisas importantes sobre o momento, a vida, remedios, dores, . . . eu escutei tudo, nene. nao tema por um minuto que suas palavras tenham sido em vao, apesar de meu estado de angustia. tudo certo e anotadissimo aqui. depois ela precisou ir para uma reuniao e nos encontramos na saida do trabalho dela e tomamos o onibus - certo dessa vez - e fomos ate a cidade e conversamos mais um pouco antes de ela ter que ir embora. foi um alento de Deus!

cheguei em casa e contactei a clinica de psicologia da universidade e a clinica de saude tambem.

ai, ontem, dia 5 de outubro, fui de tarde falar com a medica. ela disse a mesma coisa que eu ja tinha ouvido sobre o remedio, que vai demorar uns dias a fazer efeito, pra eu ter paciencia. e que por isso sugere que eu so comece a tomar o remedio quando voltar da viagem. falei pra ela que tenho lexotan e ela disse que posso tomar se sentir que preciso. ela acha que nao eh coisa de hormonio meu problema.

ela disse tambem que eu preciso de terapia comportamental cognitiva. ela escreveu la e vai me recomendar para um terapeuta. eu vou receber um telefonema de alguem e fazer isso por telefone. e falou para eu ter comigo um saco de papel para respirar por ele se passar mal. ela anotou tudo falando de claustrofobia e da crise de panico e escreveu tambem que nao eh depressao. imprimiu um material para eu ler sobre o medicamento, para eu saber o que to tomando. muito atenciosa, como sempre. adoro ela. contei pra ela dos ultimos eventos e disse que nao to nem um trisco deprimida, que to ate feliz e vou viajar com o mike. foi importante demais pra mim esse momento em que eu falei que nao to deprimida, porque ficou mais claro pra mim o que to sentindo, porque a angustia da crise me invade e toma dimensoes irreais e injustas que fazem minha pobre alma sofrer mais ainda.

tambem hoje de tarde recebi telefonema da clinica da uni. ta agendada uma sessao com a terapeuta da uni para a proxima semana.

se Deus quiser tudo vai se ajustar.

mike e eu estamos empolgados com a viagem. saimos de southampton direto para paris aeroporto de orly. e de volta eh direto e rapido tambem. daqui pra la, de la pra ca. vamos na sexta e voltamos na segunda-feira no final do dia.

amem,
kalina

Monday, 12 September 2011

resultado do sorteio

12 sept 2011

aqui vai o resultado do sorteio do livro. muito obrigada por todas as leitoras que participaram do sorteio. a sortudona da vez eh a Karla. parabens!!!

1. Cintia, Kent, Inglaterra
blog: http://longedoceara.blogspot.com


2. Veronica Anderson, Pensilvania Estados Unidos
blog:
http://www.theshticks.com/


3. Mercedes, Teresina, Brasil
blog:
http://corpoestranho.blogspot.com


4. Karla, Southampton, Inglaterra
blog: http://kkerlley.blogspot.com/

5. Simone, Fortaleza, Brasil
blog: http://revisaosimone.blogspot.com/  


6. Janaina, Brasilia, Brasil
 

Tuesday, 6 September 2011

sorteio

06 sept 2011


sorteio no soton times 
querido leitor /a:
o soton times esta fazendo tres anos e como forma de compartilhar a alegria faz o sorteio do livro 'The shop on Blossom street' da autora Debbie Macomber. o objetivo principal do sorteio eh ter um contato mais proximo com voce, saber um pouco sobre quem voce eh.
 
regras para participar:
1. responder a todas as perguntas abaixo listadas, aqui mesmo nesse post. voce pode copiar e colar as perguntas para sua inscricao, como formulario. 2. submeter apenas uma inscricao. 3. responder, se sorteado/a, no prazo maximo de tres dias me dando o endereco para onde o brinde deve ser enviado. passado esse periodo sem seu contato, o livro volta para a mesa de sorteio.
 
o sorteio vale para todos que queiram participar, de qualquer lugar do mundo. nao precisa necessariamente ser alguem que tenha blog. as inscricoes se encerram no dia 11/09/2011, proximo domingo, aa meia noite, hora de londres. o sorteio sera realizado pelo site random no dia 12/09/2011, meu horario, que eh quatro horas a mais que a hora de brasilia. em seguida eu informarei o resultado aqui no blog e entao vou aguardar o contato com detalhes para enviar o livro a voce sortudo/a.
 
1. nome ou apelido:
1.1 blog (se tiver e quiser divulgar):
2. onde voce mora
2.1. brasil: cidade e regiao:
2.2. exterior: cidade, regiao e pais:
3. sobre o que voce gosta de ler / ver no soton times?
4. sobre o que voce gostaria de ler no soton times?
 
super boa sorte!!!

Friday, 15 July 2011

amor de mae

15 july 2011

[email enviado a minha irma sobre uma encomenda que minha mae me mandou por uma amiga que veio passar as ferias na europa e teve londres como base]

nene

diga pra mamae por mim, por favor, muito muito muito obrigada pelas encomendas, tao elegantemente arrumadas. adorei. chega deu pena desfazer o laco que segurava os vestidos. muito lindo mesmo. quanta delicadeza e carinho. adorei o perfume, que eh exatamente o que eu queria e ate maior ainda que o exemplo que eu tinha aqui. o po compacto eh chique e a cor vai dar certo, sim.

ainda nao provei a blusa que ela mandou porque peguei o pacote e tive que deixar em casa e vir pra universidade, mas experimento ainda hoje. nossa, gostei muito mesmo.

e muito obrigada a voce tambem, pelo anel que voce mandou e que infelizmente a Val esqueceu de botar no pacote por enquanto. mas vou recebe-lo na volta da viagem dela, la pelo dia 30 desse mes.

ainda to sem computador em casa, ja faz quase uma semana. se eu ligar do celular eh muito caro. fala pra mamae que nao to ligando porque to assim, mas to ligada ai nos pessoal do coracao. beijo no venicio pelo aniversario dele hoje.

beijo e saudades. . . .
morena

Sunday, 19 June 2011

on the road: highcliffe beach

19 june 2011


mike and i went for a great and relaxing walk by highcliffe beach , part of the Christchurch borough, today. the day was windy and a bit chilly, but worth all the while. i needed the fresh air to clear my lungs and to relax. in addition to the beauty of the place there is the beauty of the country roads, which i like so much. on our way back we stopped by the walhampton arms for a sunday roast. that was another fair treat.

music: stacey kent in basingstoke

about yesterday, 18 june 2011

yesterday we went to stacey kent's wonderful jazz concert at the anvil in basingstoke. we also listened to her great music both ways on the road. what a day and what a night! the day was bright and beautiful when we drove there. the night was ours when we drove back to southampton. it was my third time seeing her show here and the first time with mike, who said he was happy to go to a concert of my choice, to listen to my music.

this show was a transition between her french cd / tour and the new one which should be released soon. she left the concert straight to the studio with her band. she told me she will come round next year with the new cd. i need to mark that one in my diary.

a few days before i sent her a message saying we would go to the show and said where we'd be seated. she spotted me and greeted me from the stage. i was thrilled. she has been to brazil a couple of times for concerts since i last saw her. mike was much impressed to see her treating by my first name. he said 'you two are friends on a first name basis'. during the break she autographed her cds that i have and love. and we had our photo taken.

'. . . quer guardar o mundo em mim' (Caetano Veloso)
she loves our music. stacey said beautiful things about brazil and its people and its music. she sang joao gilberto, jobim, and caetano. she introduced the song 'coracao vagabundo' by saying she fell in love with the lyrics of the song and explained to the audience how it represents the brazilian people who have so much hope and warmth and joy in their hearts. she translated the first lines into english but then sang it in portuguese:

'meu coracao nao se cansa
de ter esperanca
de um dia ser tudo o que quer
. . . ' caetano veloso

i loved the concert, once again. music inebriates my soul.

Friday, 17 June 2011

le plat du jour: thai food

17 june 2011
delicious dinner at Sara's. the thai restaurant in portswood. i ate again the panang chicken and mike had lamb. for dessert we shared a plate with some fruits and two scoops of ice cream. they don't specialize in desserts. the programme was great and we went to trago pub afterwards for a while. then, we walked home.

film: senna

about yesterday 16 june 2011


ontem fomos assistir o otimo documentario ‘senna’ no harbour lights. a producao franco-americana de 2010 mostra a vida e a carreira do melhor piloto de formula um de seu tempo, com cenas ineditas de videos da familia e muito mais. o filme mostra tambem os bastidores da formula um e suas reunioes, varias vezes tensas e que dao uma ideia da pressao que ele recebia nesse mundo que, como senna diz, eh cheio de politica e de dinheiro, diferente do comeco da sua carreira, ainda como o corredor de kart Ayrton Senna, que ele menciona numa entrevista anos aa frente de muito que passou.

varias cenas me fizeram lembrar do nosso senna e de como nos, brasileiros, estavamos inconsolaveis com uma morte tao prematura, absurda e anaceitavel, como se a morte pudesse ser inaceitavel. foi mais uma dessas despedidas dolorosas em que a gente fica querendo ser magico e bem poderoso para traze-lo de volta, mas a vida nao nos da esse poder.

eu fiquei pensando em como, quando ele ta ganhando um mundial de formula um, vencendo, tendo ultrapassado varios pilotos, ele ja se sabe vencedor e diz que foi Deus que lhe deu a vitoria. um homem que alcanca o sucesso mais almejado e grandioso, um titulo mundial, e diz que foi Deus, revela uma humildade que so as almas boas tem, a de nao se sentir Deus. achei muito bacana ele dizer que ainda tinha muito o que aprender como homem, que aos 30 e poucos anos de idade talvez estivesse na metade de sua vida, que a carreira de piloto poderia nao durar mais muito tempo, mas que ele precisava ainda aprender muito mais coisas da vida. nas entrevistas ele revelava o que sentia, nao se ocupava de passar imagem de grande. muito, muito linda a cena quando ele vence em interlagos e desmaia, tem dores insuportaveis nos ombros e mal consegue se mexer. a equipe o ajuda a sair do carro e quando, nos bastidores, ele ve o pai, pede que o pai chegue perto dele e lhe de um abraco suave. esse momento foi magico.

as vitorias, os milhoes e o sucesso nao tiraram o sorriso leve da pessoa integra e profissional que senna era. foi bom ve-lo tambem sabendo se proteger e se colocar, como mostra uma das discussoes das reunioes, e algumas entrevistas. antes e por tras de cada vitoria ha um mundo pra se vencer que a midia nao consegue mostrar; ofoco eh sempre em um aspecto apenas. muito bacana ver a tragetoria da carreira dele e as passagens pela toleman, onde estreou em 1984, depois a lotus, a mclaren e finalmente a williams, com muitas vitorias, de premios em paises diferentes e de mundiais. mas eu senti falta de saber mais sobre a vida diaria de treinos dele e do trabalho com o nuno cobra, seu preparador fisico.

o documentatio traz cenas do brasil muito miseravel daquela epoca, epoca de verdades ainda escondidas na nossa historia. eu fiquei chocada com o contraste e tomei um susto, de verdade. quando a gente nao ve a miseria com frequencia, se esquece que ela existe. nos, brasileiros, nao duvidamos que ela exista, mas o conforto da vida nos distancia dessa realidade perversa e contrastante que existe no brasil. o filme tem a participacao efetiva da irma dele, viviane senna, narrando fatos e acrescentando informacoes. ela aparece em imagens numa cena breve de familia e no final, no velorio. quando vi o caixao meu coracao doeu, parece sempre o susto do indesejado evento. chorei, chorei muito assistindo o filme, que tinha o pouco publico de quase sempre no harbour lights. e agradeco muito ao mike pela mao calorosa segurando a minha o tempo todo.

e a chuva, sua companheira maravilhosa? ah, a chuva!

Monday, 13 June 2011

feliz dia dos namorados

about yesterday, 12 june 2011
l'artiste et sa muse
12 june is valentine's day in brazil. it was justly celebrated here, too. how? by

- waking up in the morning to find a sweet valentine's day card at breakfast surprisingly written in portuguese 'feliz dia dos namorados';

- enjoying a rainy and windy day;

- going shopping for food [in the rain];

- appreciating andy warhol's exhibition at the city art gallery. the set of pieces at the city gallery are worth a visit. the other set, which is at hansard gallery at the university of southampton we didn't like very much;

- eating pear, garlic and mushroom cheese with stone baked bread for lunch;

- watching on cosy sofa the american film 'brother, where art thou?';

- eating 'winter in summer chicken' with new potatoes and drinking wine for dinner while listening to good brazilian music;

- . . .

le plat du jour: camarao cremoso

13 june 2011


nota: essa minha receita saiu no site pimenta no reino no final de maio. foi uma alegria enorme pra mim ter minha receita no site da Faby Zanelati
Camarão cremoso gratinado

Quando eu cozinho minha filosofia é não usar mais do que duas panelas. Na maioria das vezes é apenas uma mesmo. Gosto de, quando vou comer, já ter o máximo de coisas limpas. Eu moro em hall de residência da universidade, faço minhas refeições no meu quarto, e minhas instalações culinárias se limitam a uma prateleira na geladeira, uma prateleira no freezer e duas portas nos armários da cozinha. Ali armazeno minha comida (tem alguma coisa no meu quarto também) e panelas e canecas de cafe / chá e talheres e pratos e temperos. Então, para viver feliz estipulo alguns limites que sejam gerenciáveis para minha pessoa, e assim sempre que cozinho faco o suficiente para duas ou três refeições. Adorei fazer – e comer – esse camarão.

Ingredientes
2 col sopa de azeite de oliva extra virgem trufado com mangericão
300 gramas de camarões
um pouco de pimenta calabresa (quanto você goste)
1 cebola cortada em rodelas
4 dentes de alho
4 tomates para salada (pequenos) cortados ao meio
um pouco de vinho branco
1 col sobremesa de mostarda em grãos
250 ml de cream elmlea do tipo simples (primo do creme de leite)
1 col de sopa (so pra dar um sabor) de cream cheese (requeijão)
queijo parmesão pra gratinar no final

Modo de fazer
Não medi criteriosamente nada. Essas medidas são aproximadas, mesmo, só pra dar uma idéia. antes de começar a cozinhar deixei todos os ingredientes cortadinhos e no ponto para serem adicionados à panela. Refoguei o alho e a cebola no azeite. Fogo médio. Acrescentei os tomates. Não mexi muito. Fui deixando pegar um sabor. Adicionei e refoquei os camarões, que soltaram um pouco d’água. Fogo baixo pra secar um pouco da água e assim ir ficando mais cremoso. Acrescentei a pimenta calabresa, a mostarda em grãos e o vinho branco. Quando tava quase pronto, com os camarões cozidos, acrescentei o cream almlea e o requeijão e deixei cozinhar mais um pouquinho. Arrumei esse preparado num pirex, joguei uma chuvinha feliz de queijo parmesão ralado na hora por cima e levei ao forno pra gratinar.

Comi o camarão com esse arroz tailandês cozido só com água, sem sal ou óleo. Também não acrescentei sal ao camarão, deixei que ele ficasse só com o que já recebe dos outros ingredientes do prato. Enquanto o pirex com os camarões estava no forno eu fui limpando os sinais do meu servico na cozinha, que compartilho com mais seis estudantes: três da china, um dos estados unidos, uma do canadá, e um da india.

Sunday, 12 June 2011

beer festival

about yesterday, 11 june 2011

pub crawls [going from a pub to another pub for another drink] are highly popular here. last night jc, johnny, mike and i started off at 'the southwestern', mike's local pub. we stayed there for a while and decided to go check out the beer festival at 'the junction inn'. there were many people at the festival, of course, and a karaoke was going on. we stayed there for a while and were headed back to the southwestern later on.

the many locally brewed beers, the so many different drinks i have come to know here are fascinating. i plan to write a whole post about them. for now i show these beer barrels from the festival yesterday. at the end they are all gone. this is only a small sample of the many barrels they set up for the festival. people take it seriously and do drink them up.

Friday, 10 June 2011

o latifundio

10 june 2011

as already mentioned here, i live in the uni halls, sharing a flat with other six international students. my space in the fridge is limited to a single shelf. my space in the freezer is limited to a single shelf. as i was complaining about it a few days ago to amanda, the girl from canada, she told me that alex, the american guy, has left for good. by the way, he didn't even say goodbye to anyone other than amanda, maybe. this means i can therefore have an extra shelf in both the fridge and the freezer. it is the beginning of some luxury and more joy around here.

groupon hair

10 june 2011


this past tuesday i went to the hairdresser to have wash, cut, blow dry and conditioning plus shiatsu massage. i bought the package for a competitive price from groupon. this is the hair of the day, when the result seemed fine, but now i am thinking i will need another haircut soon as i am not too pleased. i am crazy about having both sizes of my hair the same length. the woman checked it at my request and said it was ok but she didn't convince me. lesson learned about groupon: it may a fantastic deal, provided you have at least an idea of what kind of service you are to get; otherwise you may end up like myself this: not so happy.

Thursday, 9 June 2011

upside down

9 june 2011

at the very moment:

- i am biting my nails. getting to the fingers soon.
15 june 2011 update: i polished my nails today. that means i won't bite them for a while.

- i have been working on a chapter for my upgrade viva. i know what and how to do it, but i don't go straight to the point and get the job done. i think and think and think and slowly do a bit of something. will i change someday? will i go somewhere this way?
15 june 2011 update: am done with a new version to the chapter, and have sent it out to ros. as always, wish i had done more, but am quite happy with what i accomplished so far.

- i will meet again with my supervisor next week. i wish sooo bad i could get to her with loads beautifully done, but something in the very inside of me holds me back from being the productive soul i idealize for myself.
17 june 2011 update: i will meet with her today. all ready and happy to meet up, but am a little worried about the allergic cold which i have now (again). whenever the weather blows any different wind or we get some rain i get ill. it is becoming routine, and i am not happy about it.

- yes, i am eating too much.

- my tv is not working. it has been over a month now. it seems the brand new and expensive aerial i bought not long ago is no longer good enough to get the digital signal. or is it that the tv is really old? i do miss watching tv, the news, the films, and the documentaries.
16 june 2011 update: mike fixed it, although he says it might not work fine for very long, since it apparently is about the digital signal. i even bought a new aerial from john lewis. now i have to give it back to the shop and be reimbursed on my money.

- my new mobile does not work properly. i can't ring brazil from it. i couldn't even text my sister from it yesterday. i have no internet connection on it either. i have no patience or time to go ring these people and spend forever with them on the phone to try and sort out these things. this time it seems i have no choice. i might try their shop in city, though.
23 june 2011 update: it is all sorted out. i now know what happened to my bill and everything is working properly. phew! it was nice to have karlota with me.

- my laptop is all the time shutting down unexpectedly. is it a virus? i have no antivirus now. but i only want to buy one when i know for certain it is going to work.

- my blogger / gmail (?) account is upside down, inside out, completely out of order, out of control. it feels like i have zero competence to manage any sort of technology programme or device.
13 june 2011 update: problem sorted out thanks to Karen.

if you know where the light is, please do not hesitate to contact me.

Monday, 6 June 2011

le plat du jour: arroz com ovo

6 june 2011


hoje fiz esse prato que ficou bem saboroso. fritei 2 ovos na manteiga de ervas com alho. ai ali mesmo, aproveitando o calor, botei uma sobra de arroz chines que tinha feito apenas com agua, sem sal nenhum. adicionei um trisco minimo de sal pra quebrar a ausencia do mesmo (esse trecho aqui ta parecendo carta). mexi mexi e apaguei o fogo. adicionei uma chuvinha fina de hortela. gostinho surpreendente.

Sunday, 5 June 2011

on the road: winchester

5 june 2011

- we love winchester, don't we?

that was my answer to mike's invite for a walk in winchester. it was about 4 o'clock in the afternoon and the day had been gray and cold and rainy, perfect to stay indoors. but mike insisted we needed some fresh air and a walk. there we went. we walked through the city, then down by the river, and into the water meadows. oh, my! it was healing. once in a while a few drops of a shy rain but it didn't bother us at all.

after the walk we had dinner at 'fishers pond', a posh pub in colden common, hampshire. it is on way from winchester to southampton. there were many people (families) there eating dinner. by they way, i've heard many times the english use the word 'tea' to say 'dinner', and i find it a cute trace of their english identity. the food at the fishers pond is good, but not different from anything i can have right here at my lovely cowherds (also a posh pub), but the view from the lake is worth the trip. i wanted to eat something succulent; so i ordered chicken and ham pie, and mike had meat. we once again had a wonderful time in winchester.

below you see photos from our walk and the last one is the view from the pub. got this information about the lake:
"Fisher's Pond itself is an artificial lake held back by an earth dam at one end and adjacent to Marwell Zoo. The pond was constructed to allow the then Bishop of Winchester to have fish supplied to his table, especially in winter. The pub is a former cafe." from mike catell's flickr.

just as we left the river and going towards the water meadows

the water meadows

the water meadows
 
view from inside the fishers pond pub


Saturday, 4 June 2011

conference in london

4 june 2011

today i went to london with rahmah, a course peer, to attend the '4th bloomsbury student conference in applied linguistics' at the birkbeck university of london.

we left southampton quite early, in the 7.30am train. we got the tube to the conference, got off at goodge station and walked to birkbeck college, where we arrived there on time for everything: coffee, keynote speaker, and all the other presentations, including mine, which was a poster presentation titled 'esl teaching in brazil's municipal schools: contextualized writing?'.

we attend four presentations plus the poster session, which took place at the same room and time of the lunch they served us. very handy. the conference was interesting and i liked very much two of the presentations we attend. people seemed interested in my research and came to ask me questions about it. it felt nice. after i attend many talks i get easily distracted and unfocused. it is terrible, but i can't help it.

we left the conference before it ended because we had plans to go wildly shopping on oxford street. it was a hot day, i mean, fine for me, but very hot for rahmah. i was carrying all the time my immense a1 poster folded in the tube with me, and that is not something you would dream of doing often.

we walked for a while browsing around, window shopping. . . and my conclusion is that i, kalina, will not go again shopping on oxford street. what is the point? the very same - the very same - standard shops they have we do have here: m&s, gap, bhs, next, just to name same. ah, the perfume shop as well. for me it doesn't make any sense to go shopping when in that crowded and busy street when i can do the same here, far more comfortably.

after walking up to bond street we decided we'd had enough and were ready to head back home. we got the tube at bond street station and had a perfect timing to get the 3.35pm train back to southampton. it was a smooth and tranquil journey, just the way there in the morning had been. there only a few people in the train and i could be quiet for a while, appreciating the landscape.

before we got back in the train i was feeling exhausted. i wanted to stop and be quiet, not say a single word. these days it has happened to me that i get very tired of speaking english for many days in a row, many hours in a day, and that it has been enough.

we got to the station here in about 1.15hr. i took the usual u1a bus home and am now resting a little bit. i will later on meet with mike and johnny at the giddy bridge, a very noisy pub on london road. he is now at a music festival to which he invited me, but no, thanks. i can barely stand up. i need a rest from the world for at least two hours. then, i will be ready to go out again, renovated. i'll walk to the giddy bridge to meet up with them.

Friday, 3 June 2011

mfl conference

3 june 2011

today we had the research student workshop: "research perspectives on modern foreign languages in uk schools", organized by my supervisor, ros mitchell, and two of her supervisees who do research in uk schools. the one-day conference, that happened at building 34 - education, in highfield, had the participation of twelve uk universities. the keynote speaker was professor suzanne graham, from the university of reading, who spoke about learner strategies.

the other presentations, all about ongoing research about the teaching of a foreign modern language in uk schools were interesting. for me it is a good experience to hear about the research carried out here in this multicultural environment. the multicultural aspect of life here, obviously observed in schools is itself not surprisingly object of many studies throughout the country. another point that has caught my attention is the wealth of foreign languages the students have the opportunity to study, and that scarcity of resources and other serious problem like the ones my teachers face in public schools in brazil are not even mentioned. are they really not part of the scenario? it is like an ideal world. the most popular languages object of research today were french and german. anyway, after listening to four presentations in a row my brain nearly collapsed.

other than that i should say i'm happy for the productive week i've had so far: 1. am finished with eng3b report and everything related to it; 2. have been to important meetings on tuesday and wednesday; 3. had my nice experience with recording in a studio; 4. had a great day yesterday: got all my prescriptions sorted out, collected poster for the birkbeck conference tomorrow, did laundry, cooked dinner for me and mike, had the dinner, and went to the movies with him. does it really read something like i did? i am impressed. i need to register these things, although they may seem very ordinary stuff for many people, i'm pleased i managed to do that much. maybe i am not that slow, afterall.

six plus four

2 - 3 june 2011

. . . and listening to radio 6 and eating creamy prawns with chinese rice, cooked by her, at his place, with strawberries and cream for dessert and drinking orange juice and diet pepsi and going to harbour lights afterwards to watch the very american 'win win', directed by thomas mccarthy and starred by paul giamatti, amy ryan, and bobby cannavale, they celebrated 10 (six plus four or six plus one plus one plus one plus one or five plus five) months together. . .

Wednesday, 1 June 2011

as estradas

1 june 2011

hoje eu tive uma experiencia nova e muito feliz. ano passado, mais ou menos em setembro eu fiz um teste de voz (avaliacao para emprego mais legal, relaxada, facil e divertida da minha vida) num estudio aqui em southampton.  o servico eh gravar material em portugues. passei no teste e fiquei no banco de dados deles para futuras oportunidades.  

finalmente semana passada recebi uma mensagem da coordenadora do estudio me chamando para um trabalho hoje, 3 horas de gravacao por um dinheiro X J.

com todas as direcoes de como chegar la em maos, eu fiz o plano de ir caminhando pelo google maps, o que dava uns 32 minutos. fiquei pensando se ia mesmo caminhando, se tomava um taxi, ou se enfrentava o onibus estranho.

decidi ir de onibus. fui ate a cidade e tomei o onibus 10a da empresa first. eu pedi aa motorista que me ajudasse a descer no ‘bingo’ em shirley. Ela falou que ia sim me avisar e eu paguei £1.60 pela viagem. e ali sentei feliz.

no meio do caminho entrou um senhor com muita dificuldade de locomocao e com um aparelho pra andar daqueles que parece um andaja de crianca. o povo ajudando, o homem se ajeitando no local destinado a pessoas com dificuldade, mas sem ainda sentar. a motorista falou pra ele que so podia sair quando ele estivesse sentado. incrivel como nos onibus aqui os motoristas acompanham o que acontece no onibus e tem que acomodar bem passageiros em dificuldade. o senhor la sentou e seguimos na nossa viagem, e eu na estrada feliz da minha vida.

dai a pouco a motorista solta bem alto no onibus ‘next stop is the bingo’. O onibus todo riu e eu me levantei pra descer, acusando ser eu quem ia para o bingo. desci no bingo e, seguindo as direcoes, cheguei ao estudio.

a gravacao durou tres horas e meia. me surpreendi como achei dificil aas vezes falar algumas palavras longas e mais dificeis em portugues, principalmente quando estao na mesma frase e precisam ser ditas claramente. depois escutamos tudo com cuidado. varias partes foram refeitas. foi muito bom e eu achei que o trabalho final ficou melhor do que eu esperava.

e tomei o onibus de volta, leve e feliz pela empreitada que trouxe graca ao meio dia. passei nos correios e postei um cartao de aniversario para minha tia Maria, que mora em curitiba e vai fazer 80 anos agora em junho.

eu ia cantarolando o tempo todo, na minha cabeca, essa musica . . .
“Solto a voz nas estradas, já não quero parar . . .” do Milton Nascimento e Fernando Brandt.

Sunday, 29 May 2011

wrong time wrong person wrong place

29 may 2011


wrong time: this weekend (27 - 29 may)
wrong person: i
wrong place: in london for the weekend.

the day before yesterday (friday) i got the coach to spend the weekend in london. i booked the return ticket to 3.30 this afternoon. trouble is i was not at peace there as i kept thinking all the time of my duties left behind here. i couldn't stop thinking of the many things i should be doing here instead of enjoying a weekend away.

after many hours of turmoil i decided to change the time my ticket and got the 10.00 o'clock coach this morning. what a relief, and a lesson learned: it is time to concentrate on my research. i decided to put a hold on the other insanities that were occupying my mind, i.e. travelling. it was a beautiful day today and the trip back was good. i took the time to appreciate the road and the cars and to think.

i got off the coach at the uni interchange and - again - embarked on the wrong bus. i got into u2b instead of waiting for a moment for either u2c or u1c. u2b is only good for me when i go to uni, not from uni. and again i visited the neighborhoods. it didn't bother happy me at all.

Friday, 27 May 2011

noticia daqui la ali

27 may 2011

hoje o soton times virou noticia no blog Pimenta no Reino, da Fabiana Zanelati
com a receita de um camarao cremoso gratinado que eu fiz. isso mesmo, por hoje o plat du jour ta publicado la. nao sou craque na cozinha, nao sou mesmo, mas o camarao ficou bonito e muito saboroso. resolvi mostrar pra Faby, e la esta, na primeira pagina. quanta alegria!!!
obrigada de montao, Faby.

Thursday, 26 May 2011

busy and cold and wet and happy

26 may 2011

highfield campus this morning. photo taken with my mobile phone.
i started the day with a consultation with my gp, who gave me good news about my health. uhlala! but i still have lots of things to do, and she gave me some very useful hints. she suggested i read about 'low gi diet' and explained why i would benefit from it. dr armstrong is so caring. i told her of things i have been doing in my constant struggle to have some control over my weight. she renewed my prescriptions and said we might consider lowering the already low medication i take to keep my blood pressure under control. i was pleased and surprised to see my blood pressure very much under control today. i suppose it might be a result of my low intake of sodium.

then i went by the accommodation office to pay for my rent fee. what a hassle. my credit card decides not to work when i most need it. i ended up going to natwest for an alternative and got all the problem sorted out in the end. i had to walk around campus and from highfield to avenue under a rainy / wet, windy, cold, bizarre weather. however, it felt quite warm inside the buildings. go figure!!!

Wednesday, 25 May 2011

e viva o viva

25 may 2011


hoje, agora a pouco, eu estava ali no crown inn almocando com a diana. ai a hilra me telefonou de dentro de um taxi, a caminho da universidade, pra ir para o viva voce dela, hoje ali em seguida. viva voce eh como chamam a defesa da tese de doutorado aqui. primeiro que foi uma peleja pra eu conseguir atender o telefone, porque ainda to apanhando aprendendo a usar o danado. e ai:
- onde tu ta, nene?
- to no crown inn, sabe onde eh? eh um pub entre highfield e avenue (dois campi da universidade aqui pertinho)
- ah, sei nao, oh. eu queria te dar um abraco. to indo pro meu viva agora.
- agora? eita, eu pensava que era so sexta. tava pensando em ti, pra ti mandar um email.
- nao, eh agora. perai, vou perguntar ao motorista aqui se ele sabe onde eh.
(perguntou (conversa em ingles) e o motorista confirmou que sabe, sim, onde fica o pub)

e la eu vejo, de dentro do pub, o taxi passar e estacionar ali na frente. fui ao encontro da hilra, para da-la um abraco grande. maroquilda estava tao linda e chique a caminho de seu momento de estrelato, de fechamento de um projeto que representa tanto.

para mim, na minha experiencia,  essa eh uma conquista que nao se localiza na esfera academica apenas, nao nao nao. eh um processo que sofre / recebe influencias dos sonhos, dos empenhos, das pedras que encontramos no caminho, das alegrias, das curiosidades, das horas incalculaveis (e pra que calcular?) de leitura e descoberta do mundo e de nos mesmos. o processo do phd invade a vida da gente, define quem somos, modifica a gente, parece que nao eh mais possivel dissociar academia e vida pessoal. os momentos de coleta de dados, de investigacao, eu os sinto todos como investigacao de mim mesma, de como e porque faco parte. . . como tambem faz parte, aqui nessa cultura, a mesa de um pub. a mesa de um pub aqui nao eh lugar (so) de vagabundo, mas eh tambem um ponto de encontro, descobertas, fechamento de acordos, entendimentos da vida. . .

eu fiquei muito mas muito feliz mesmo de ver maroquilda achar tempo pra ir me ver para um abraco magico nesse momento inesquecivel da vida dela.

mas foi muito engracado quando eu ia caminhando, dentro do pub, ao encontro dela no taxi, como meu pensamento so me dizia: 'to no crown inn'. e eu pensei: 'conversa de gente vagabunda estar num pub ao meio dia de uma quarta-feira, eh?' talvez nem seja tao mal. foi uma pausa de uma hora apenas. e voltei pro avenue campus com a diana. e ca estou firme de volta no servico. o pub eh um carregador de baterias automatico.

Thursday, 19 May 2011

manha tao bonita manha

19 may 2011


i went to bed last night thinking of going for a walk at the park this morning. i woke up this morning feeling my life would get stuck if i didn't go for the walk. i checked out the weather: 5 degrees and a beautiful sunshine. for a moment i felt tempted to stay indoors but it was clear to me i needed and did want the walk.

am thankful to the birds singing to me everytime i walk at the park and i feel so much better, i breath fresh air, my digestion improves right away; the list of benefits is endless. i get answers to some puzzles that have been keeping me company, i clear my head.

tao bom caminhar na manha tao bonita manha.

Monday, 16 May 2011

a step forward

16 may 2011

i met with ros today. lots of negotiations about content and outline for the thesis. many many plans and dreams on what goes where. she wants to meet me more often now. next meeting is next week. told her about my difficulties concerning technologies and that not even an excel spreadsheet i know how to use. she said we'll have a session on this if need be.
oh my!!! all the time i am happy and stuck and slow and happy and stuck and slow. wish so bad i could change this pattern and finally become the productive person i urge so that i can carry on with my phd research in a more relaxed mode.

the original taste

16 may 2011


originally from south and central asia, naan bread has become popular in many other countries. this one from photo i had at the gurkha chef, the nepalese and indian restaurant we went to in winchester the other day. it was so ethnic and special it didn't resemble one bit the one i had before long ago from a regular supermarket.

this is my point: if you want to try something which is new to you, like ethnic food or a typical dish (fish and chips), make sure you have access to the good sources, otherwise you may have a negative experience and think that is all about the dish. i had good / original naan bread a while ago at an indian restaurant here in southampton. it really made me think. the taste was so good it felt like i was having it for the first time. i have had the same experience with fish and chips, a staple in english food. you have to check and find the places / restaurantes where it is cooked fresh and by a specialist.

Saturday, 14 May 2011

diana's birthday celebration

14 may 2011


diana and i met uptown, browsed around tkmaxx. she bought herself a pair of shoes. i was glad to find the door hanger for clothes i had been searching for. i was in awe for quite a while at their kitchen utensils section. then we went to specsavers for me to finally collect my second pair of reading glasses.

we went to bella italia for lunch. the day was beautiful, a little cold but not too much. it really felt nice. our lunch was super good. diana had a smoked salmon and asparagus pizza. it tasted delicious. i have eaten bad pizza before there, but this time it was a good choice. i ate insalata pollo e pancetta, which is a whole sliced chargrilled chicken breast, red onion, plum tomatoes, crispy pancetta and baby gem lettuce with creamy dolcelatte dressing (description pasted here from their website). oh my! my salad was excellent.

chat chat chat about travelling, academia, men, life, family, and friends, plus chocolate vanilla strawberry caramel ice cream for dessert. i came back home to get ready for tea later. diana was back into town to continue shopping. as i said in the title of the post, this was to celebrate diana's birthday. she has other celebration in a trip to london with her boyfriend, andrew.

Thursday, 12 May 2011

u2b: the accidental journey

12 may 2011


how could we two - it took two - embark on the wrong bus? the consequences were that we went through, undesired at that moment, roads and roads and roads and neighbourhoods when we could not really afford it timewise. thank God everything got sorted in the end and hope it only meant a little, not serious, delay. am glad maroquilda is back and so serene. we need to meet up again for a proper chat and cafe feliz.

Tuesday, 10 May 2011

academia & pub

10 may 2011


i went to the cowherds tonight with my german students elke and bernd. it was nothing planned. it just happened that we chatted a little after class and walked together because the way to the pub is the same as my way home, and we three ended up at the pub. the pub here is where life is sorted out, where you get into and out of trouble, where you learn and teach. yes, the pub here is more or less where we live.

and it happens that we had a great talk about a variety of topics: housing, here and back home; money; loneliness; flatmates and the oddities of sharing space; and other things. we talked a lot about travelling around the uk. all in all they sort of interviewd me, asking me loads of questions about me and my life. it felt nice to see people so interested in learning about me. i promptly responded to all of their questions. we ate mediterranean food and drank shandy. i had bitter shandy. i love the cowherds because it is very comfortable, serves good food, and is located at the common, a 4-minute walk from where i live.

elke is working on her phd and came to england for six months only as a research student. before coming here she was living in berlin. her study is about the pension systems both here in uk and in germany. she joined the english class to improve her english and also to socialize. she seems to be happy with her accomplishments here so far. elke said i am a very interesting person with a very interesting life. what a nice comment to receive from somebody.

bernd is a violin maker from the germanic bavaria. he has a job in romsey and lives by himself. i keep telling him he needs to socialize more and find himself a girlfriend to keep him company. he is very young and such a nice guy to spent so much time alone. he agrees and we laugh. i love to listen to his stories about violin making. it sounds like a magic profession to me.

Monday, 9 May 2011

le plat du jour: file de frango marinado

9 may 2011

file de frango marinado com shoyu e acucar demerara



fiquei muito tentada a cozinhar o file de frango bacana da Karen e fiz da receita uma desculpa para estrear minha frigideira / grill que promete ser 'a panela' mas que tem sido fonte de decepcao, por enquanto. agora conto como fiz o frango, que ficou moreninho da silva catole e muito mas muito delicioso mesmo. nao medi nada, foi no olho. ate acresencentei um pouquinho de acucar depois e tive a impressao de que exagerei no molho shoyu.

400 gr de file de frango (o meu tava cortado em pedacos pequenos)
lavei esse frango com limao, ou suco de limao, que a gente compra no ponto aqui.

para a marinada:
oleo (fiquei doida pra botar azeite mas obedeci aa receita)
shoyu (desconfio que exagerei uma coisinha aqui)
acucar mascavo (eu usei demerara, orientacao da chef karen)
vinho branco (eu nao tinha saquê, que eh tambem opcional)
dois dentes de alho em lascas bem fininhas
uma cebola cortada em meias luas (eu so tinha cebola roxa, que nao aconselho)

misturei todos os ingredientes - marinada e frango - em um saco plastico para sanduiche. acho que o pobre do saco deveria ser maior. misturei bem misturadinho e deixei na geladeira um tempo, talvez meia hora.

depois dessa marinada, ta tudo no ponto e comecei a grelhar o frango. tirei o frango do saco e deixei a marinada la por enquanto. fui grelhando o frango no super decepcionante por enquanto grill bem aquecido (acho que deixei o coitado esquentar demais), e fui grelhando os filezinhos de frango muito bem, mais ou menos uns seis minutos de cada lado. fui repetindo essa operacao em pequenas porcoes e devagar para nao encher de agua a frigideira. como achei meio seco e quente demais botei um pouco de oleo. e repeti a operacao ate ter grelhado todo o frango. no intervalo entre as porcoes de frango dei uma limpada com papel toalha na frigideira. como eu ja tinha feito alguma coisa errada no grill ele quis ficar com um pouco do papel,  mas deu tudo certo.

reservei os lindos files de frango grelhados e deitei a marinada na frigideira, que tava la com os sucos do frango, e deixei ali no fogo brando ate ficar tudo macio. ficou super saboroso. a mistura do shoyu com o acucar e a cebola e o frango grelhado eh uma delicia. para acompanhar fiz um pure de batata, daquelas em po que a gente compra aqui. isso mesmo, piloto de fogao, pero no mucho.

Sunday, 8 May 2011

new year's curry in winchester

about last night 7 may 2011


photo 1: the starter; photo 2: maudie, marie, and jc; photo 3: the cuties
mike and I met with steven at the train station and traveled together to winchester for our 2010 – 2011 new year’s curry at the nepalese and indian restaurant gurkha chef.

we were ten for the night: from the uk: mike (welsh), and the english ones: johnny, jc, marie, steven, the team leader maudie, and warren; and the foreigners murielle and celine (both French), and myself with my verde amarelo branco azul anil heart. In other words, we were ten people, with four nationalities, and from three different languages.

winchester greeted us with rain, but we carried on walking to fulfil our protocol, which is pub – restaurant – pub. Then, we head home. I want to make a point that now I understand better the itinerary that really gives everyone opportunities to interact with various of us.

the pub was the hyde tavern, a cozy but not so comfortable one. I had diet coke and a small glass of their- not-so-special house wine. at the pub I had a chat with murielle. she is french, from a small island near mauritius island. she is a chemist, lives near here, but will move soon to germany, relocated to work there. we talked about this and also about phd life and about brazil. she asked me how my research is going. i smiled and she smiled back, sharing the inherent sticks and stones we come across throughout the process. a friend of murielle’s came by her place and took away her tv when she was doing her phd so that murielle would have one less distraction and could concentrate properly on the duties. later on the friend threatened to take away her phone if she kept spending hours talking to people. we had a good laugh.

then we went to gurkha chef, the nepalese and indian restaurant. i had pork palak (barbequed pork with pork cooked in spinach, tomatoes and onions) with mushroom rice for dinner. i also tried mike’s food, as usual. it was all very good. at the restaurant i the chat was about travelling, mostly with steven, mike, and murielle.

after food food food and chat chat chat we left the restaurant. murielle and celine went home, the others went to another pub. mike and i walked back to the train station to get the 12.07 train to southampton, because it comes by the train station near his place. on our way back both to the station in winchester and in southampton we walk in the rain again. we waited for a while at the train station sitting in a bench and talking: precious moments. this was a much expected rain that did many things: it washed away my makeup and my blow dried hair, as well as some pollen from the trees. i think the long and quiet rain also cleansed both southampton and winchester and gave them a lighter, greener, and more beautiful view. it was so lovely to walk in the rain.

we finally got into the train and back home sometime around 1am today. What a night.

Saturday, 7 May 2011

karla's birthday party

7 may 2011


we just came back from karla's birthday party. later on we're going to our new year's curry celebration, in winchester.

karla's birthday party was at her boyfriend's (thomas) place, in Fareham, a small city located about 10 miles or 16.09 km from southampton. attending the party we were nine adults and a 21-month old cute boy called leonidas, who receives greek input from his father, french language from his mom, and english at the nursery he goes to.

i counted among us seven nationalities, these being the countries: brazil, greece, france, uk, iran, taiwan, and cyprus; and six different native languages: portuguese, greek, french, english, persian, and chinese. this was a great mix and we had a good laugh together and ate and drank and celebrated karlota's birthday.

the food was all vegetarian and delicious. karla prepared a salpicao, farofa, rice, and a very good brazilian feijoada. oh my i loved to have farofa. the girls baked a cake and i made a green salad with rocket, watercress, spinach, celery, cherry tomatoes, grain mustard, caesar dressing, and sprinkled parmesan cheese on top. it was very good and i was really pleased to make it. it has made me think that throughout the years i have been asked by family members back home in brazil to fix one of the dessert plates in our gatherings. a green salad seems to be a more sensible option for me to prepare, i suppose.